Five. FIVE!

by statia on April 2, 2012

Last year, I wasn’t too embracing of the fact that my son had turned four.  Rather, I was kind of pissed at his behavior.  Four was supposed to be awesome! Epic! This is what I was told! It’s a guarantee! Exclamationy point goodness!!!!!!!

So I couldn’t go into my whole asshole birdy, twitterpated, “oh my god you guys, life is so beautiful” German lacking, heartfelt “I can’t believe he’s another year old,” posts.  Because, truthfully, he started out four as being kind of a dick.  That’s right. There’s the Statia you know. The one that never sugar coats anything. Granted, it was all related to ear infections and antibiotics. Because not long after he got better.  It got better, and seriously you guys, four was the best year we ever had.  Oh my god you guys, life is so beautiful.

First of all. I can’t believe I have a five -year-old. FIVE! I still sometimes feel like I’m 18 and too young to have a kid that old. And then I wrench my back, or pull a muscle, and I’m reminded that I’m closer to 40… you know what, it isn’t important.

I had his, most likely final IEP meeting with our local Intermediate Unit.  I’ve already met with his new team for his Kindergarten IEP. My kid. He starts kindergarten. In the fall. It doesn’t compute. Anyway, his IEP meeting, his BSC (fancy term for behavioral therapist, she helps him with social interaction), who is very awesome and has done so much for the Mini, has basically made the decision to cut back her services. It’s time. All these years of having my hand held, and him having various therapies, and now he’s flourishing. The best possible outcome we could have hoped for. It’s amazing to see the transformation of his language and processing. His problem solving. This amazing kid he’s become. Funny, and smart. He’s always been smart, but he couldn’t articulate it the way he can now. The things he does. It blows my mind. After four years, I finally feel more relaxed about his development. I let him go on his first play date by himself. He talks about having sleep overs with his friends. It makes my heart shatter in a million little pieces. But no longer is it fear. It’s joy. That little infant I brought home. That little stranger, who was so long a mystery to me, is now someone I know with confidence.

I know, I need to stop with this hurly mess.  I KNOW.


Faith April 2, 2012 at 8:48 am

Aw, he’s FIVE? Wow. Time flies, eh?

Happy birthday to the Mini!!!

Starle April 2, 2012 at 10:34 am

Sounds like this is going to be a better year! This last year with my daughter has een a huge change to the asshole that she was at 7!

statia April 2, 2012 at 10:59 am

If these kids are going to alternate asshole years, I’m screwed. I feel like every other year is an asshole year for one of them, and they’re always on different pages. Get with the program, kids. Mama’s liver can’t handle the liquor overload.

jesser April 2, 2012 at 12:51 pm

So glad life is wonderful. SO SO glad. You’ve worked hard for it. You deserve it.

Shelly April 2, 2012 at 1:14 pm

I loved 4 and was a bit freaked out at 5. Five is such a big kid age to me. I have now decided that odd years are not good for us. My 4 year old was delightful (for the most part, I’m not crazy or delusional, there were moments) and 5 has brought back the asshole. My five year old is contrary to the max and a royal pain in my ass. Sigh. I hope your 5 is much much better.

statia April 2, 2012 at 2:51 pm

I agree. Odd years are shit for us, at least for him. With her, I think three might be marginally better than two (which we dealt with for at least 2 years, I swear), but that’s stretching it. She’s kind of been an asshole her whole life. I love her, but she’s exhausting. Seriously.

Tommie April 2, 2012 at 2:16 pm

My girls are 5 and 9. 9 might be my new favorite year. She can get her own breakfast, pack her own lunches, pick out her own clothes, shower without help, etc. And yet, she still likes to sit on my lap in the evenings after her sister is asleep, just being. I love that balance between independence and neediness.

5 is good the second time around too. She’s FINALLY potty trained (we have a chromosomal disorder to contend with and five is actually early for potty training for kids with her syndrome) and she’s discovered the joy of playing independently, without having to shadow me from room to room to room. We’re loving live these days too.

And whoofreakingwhoo on the final IEP meeting. That’s is seriously awesome. We’re going to be doing IEPs from now until the end of time, I fear.

statia April 2, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Tommie, he still has an IEP, but it’s through the district now, as opposed to our county IU. I’m not about to give up the IEP.

Tommie April 3, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Ahh, it’s all clear now. I completely understand holding on to the IEP. It’s crucial for Olivia, who is five turning six (in November) because we’re doing at least one year of kinderkids, maybe two. She might be almost eight before she even starts kindergarten and I’m okay with that but I don’t think the school would be if we didn’t have years and years worth of IEPs proving that she needs this extra year of pre-k experience. IEPs can be stressful but they can also be so, so important in getting our kids the services they need to succeed.

hopefulmother April 3, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Statia, would you be willing to share more about your son and his behavioral therapist and IEP in a private email? My son Al.ex will be 5 in October, has dx of CP and also mildly on the spectrum, and we are trying to figure out if an aide/behavioral therapist/shadow would be the right thing for him, and if so, *who* provides it – the school or the local regional center (CA). It would be great if you could email me with more info…

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