Double Rainbow, all the way.

by statia on August 17, 2010

When the Mini was a baby, and we were going through his whole Charlie Brown head phase, I would obsess over other people’s heads.  Adults, kids, babies.  It didn’t matter.  I would scrutinize over them.   Particularly if a man was bald,  I would check the symmetry of his head.  It was a sickness.

And then our pediatrician was like, “oh, yeah, that head thing?  So not a big deal, because your child has all sorts of red flags for Autism.”    Or something like that.

And now, I watch other kids so intently.  I study them.  And I think to myself,  ”oh that kid is SO on the spectrum.”   And I think to myself, “who the fuck am I to make that assumption?”  I’m not really qualified to say that.  I’m not a professional with years and years of medical training under their belt.  I’m just a mom, who has been in the trenches.  I’ve watched my own kids behavior under a magnifying glass.  I’ve seen other spectrum kids.   And then I think, “well, yes, I kind of am qualified to make that assumption.  Because I have seen a lot of Autistic kids.   And I hate that I can pick the one kid, out of a lineup of typical kids, that has social or language issues.   The only difference is, that I would never dare say anything to another parent unless they asked, or voiced concern, and, I don’t get the enormous paycheck to hand you a piece of paper that says  ”spectrum disorder.”

But when you get right down to it,  aren’t we all a little bit Autistic, anyway?


mrs spock August 17, 2010 at 3:32 pm

My father has schizophrenia. I swear I can pick up mental illness within a 5 block radius. You just become attuned to the subtle mannerisms.

Yo-yo Mama August 17, 2010 at 4:51 pm

You know how you’ve said you watch Miss and make comparisons to Mini? Yes, I do that too. And yes, I watch other kids, especially boys my son’s age who sit quietly in church; who make small talk with their families at gatherings; who walk calmly next to their parent when shopping…and I know they think sometimes their kid “acts out” but it’s nothing like having someone who is ADHD and I can usually peg them pretty early on as well. I feel pity for the family dealing with ADHD because sometimes that’s what I would like, instead of being looked at as a poor parent, which is what they assume is the problem.

Veronica August 17, 2010 at 8:59 pm

I keep telling myself that too, as we’re travelling the path to Aspergers. I walked through town yesterday and watched all the well behaved children, who didn’t run off, who listened and who sat nicely and wondered why I wasn’t able to parent an easy child like that?


Stacia August 18, 2010 at 9:39 pm

What an interesting thought, that we’re all on the spectrum somewhere. I like it. And I definitely agree that your years in the trenches qualify you as an expert, probably even more than some of the professionals.

Tracy August 19, 2010 at 8:48 am

I would think living through it, and educating yourself on it, probably makes you more knowledgable about it than some doctors. I mean, they know the red flags, and whatnot, but you’re living it 24/7.

Old School/New School Mom August 23, 2010 at 9:10 am

Wait…so is there an autism/head connection? Like a certain sized head is associated with autism!

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