Once I married the hubs, I would listen to my dating friends and be so happy that I was finally out of that scene. Dating is one of those things that I was never really good at. I’m awkward, I tend to overshare at inappropriate times out of sheer nervousness, or I’m just straight up too blunt for the guy.
So imagine my surprise yesterday, when I was asked out on a date.
One of the other mom’s at camp, whose son is going through the IU process, asked me out for coffee.
“Of course I’d love to go out for coffee with you.” (translation: please don’t think I’m a crazy stalker that’s desperate for friends)
We met when I saw one of the Mini’s old Early Intervention teachers inside the waiting area at camp. ”Oh Em Gee, isn’t she so awesome?” And then we realize that we’re both talking about another very beloved teacher, who I was devastated to lose when the Mini turned three.” ”OH EM GEE, seriously, is she not the best thing in the entire world? She’s like candy and cute little kittens. I want to marry that woman! Call me, we’ll get the kids together.” (translation: I LOVE YOU, MAN)
So I jokingly told my bff and husband that I had a date this morning. Neither of them seemed very jealous. And this morning, instead of getting up and throwing on a pair of yoga shorts, and a wife beater, I actually showered and combed my hair to make a good impression.
And then I put on my yoga shorts and a wife beater. You know, so as not to look too pretentious or like I’m trying to hard. Not that anyone would ever use the word pretentious to describe me.
I never realized how meeting other mothers is dating in disguise. The only difference is that (usually) you don’t have to walk them to the door and lie to them and tell them they’re the best kisser, when really, you can’t wait to get home and sop up the excess saliva with your shamwow. It’s like a delicate dance of parenting techniques without coming off as too judgmental or like you’re pushing your way as THE way to parent.
I tend to not run too much with the preschool crowd, because I don’t feel like they’re much my style, but this one, this one is pretty down to earth, and cool as a person, and a mom. So I got home and debated on whether or not to text her. And I did.
Me: So is this like real dating where we have to play coy and not call each other for four days afterwards?
Her: Nah, I’m kind of a sex on the first date kind of girl.
Me: OK fine! But only if you cuddle with me afterwards.