Wanna Cyber?

by statia on January 19, 2010

Remember when meeting someone from the internet was considered taboo?   Meeting a friend or worse, a significant other was so embarrassing and nerdy, that you made up some sort of lie, that each of you agreed on, in case anyone asked.

I went through a period of time, where that’s all I did, was date people from the internet.  I  mean, christ, I HATED the area I lived in, and I knew what the guys were like.  There was just no way in hell, I was going to end up tied down to someone local.   And of course, most of my close friends I’ve met through blogging.  I love that social media has made meeting someone online the new “normal.”  And these days, I only  have a handful of friends I met the conventional way.  And even THEY still think it’s weird that I met the Meester online.

I remember meeting my ex-husband and my in-laws being truly weirded out that he was bringing a girl he met on AOL, home to meet his parents.   I can’t blame them.  They were pretty old school and if someone asked how we met, they would kind of mumble under their breath “oh they met online.”

I have no idea what sparked this random thought, but if I think about it,  I would have never met the Meester, and my kids wouldn’t exist.   And I’d probably still be single and have lots of weird animals.

Anyone else meet their significant other online?  Or am I just odd for thinking this is trendy now?


Wendy January 19, 2010 at 3:58 pm

I met The General on Craigslist. I’m not even kidding. How romantic is that? We talk about it and people think we’re kidding. Couches, dog training tips, apartments — why not a girlfriend, too, right?

Totally met my BFF on (oh, wait for it) LIVEJOURNAL, which is where she met her boyfriend of 3 years. And yeah. My circle of closest friends right now are pretty much all from the internet.

Also: FIRST.

girlfiend January 19, 2010 at 4:23 pm

I met my husband the old fashioned way- in a bar- but we had 3 other couples over for dinner last month and all three of them met online, 2 on a dating site, 1 on craigslist.

Betty M January 19, 2010 at 4:46 pm

I met my partner at college – he was my boyfriend’s best friend – classy! There was however a gap. Honest.

My evil FIL met his partner online. Otherwise I cant think of any close friends who have. Thats probably cos Europe is generally behind in these things.

Lisa January 19, 2010 at 6:04 pm

I met my current boyfriend, of 6 years, online. The guy before him, online as well, and we were together almost 5 years. I’d say well over half the guys I dated, I met online. To me, it’s no different than meeting someone in a bar. People can lie to your face just as easily as they can lie online.

ssfb January 19, 2010 at 7:48 pm

I met Hubbin on Match. We’ll be married for 4 years this summer. People still think I’m kidding when I tell them that… of course it was my deepest darkest secret for the longest time and I would only tell people “we met through a friend…” all vague and whatnot. That’s the story I gave my mother because when I came home from our first date and said ‘we met through a friend’ she exclaimed, “Oh thank god I thought you were going to say you met him on the INTERNET!!!”. “no no, of course not…” :-/

Lala January 19, 2010 at 10:02 pm

I didn’t meet him online (my husby) but I did meet him through my Best Friend who met him through a girl she met on Pogo.com playing games – she knew him from a karaoke bar. So I got bar and online covered, just not directly :-)

Michele {moxygen} January 19, 2010 at 10:07 pm

I have met several past boyfriends online – back when it was waaaay freaky (mid-late 90′s). My husband and I were set up by friends, but before we went out we spent a week or so talking to each other online, which probably doesn’t count. lol

I don’t think it’s as taboo as it once was. I think that people are still kinda shy to admit how they met if they did it online. Really, though, I’d rather meet someone online while (mostly) sober than to meet someone in a bar while being totally sloppy drunk. Because sloppy drunk is so sexxxy.

Michelle January 20, 2010 at 6:16 am

Meee! I met my Mister in a Yahoo chat room, wayyyy back in the (relative) Internet dark ages of 1997. And yes, there was quite the stigma attached at the time.

Melissa January 20, 2010 at 11:07 am

Didn’t meet my main squeeze online. But I did date a couple of people, that I had met online, prior to meeting my husband. Not odd at all!

jenG January 20, 2010 at 12:13 pm

Well, we fell in love just before email became a standard. We were early adopters and all, but…we met the old-fashioned way: I rented a room at his parents’ house for two months while both my parents were out of state during the first two months of the semester. He was recuperating after a car accident and taking the semester off.

What? Not normal? Oh, well.

So we have a long history, and we reunited in 2008 after being out of contact for seven years. We live 2,500 miles away. People keep asking me HOW CAN WE POSSIBLY STAND IT, and I ask them if they’ve heard of the internet. And cell phones. And XboxLive. And IM. Seriously? We did the long-distance thing in the 90s, too, and this is way easier…and way cheaper. We didn’t meet online, but we rely heavily on the internet and technology in general to carry on in different zip codes while we have to. It seems to garner about the same reaction as if we’d met in a chat room.

I’ve got a list of happy match.com friends/couples, though. If it wasn’t for this love of my life thing I’ve got going, I’d be all over meeting someone online.

Jillian January 20, 2010 at 1:00 pm

I did not meet my husband online, but I sure did love online dating. Mate shopping in my pjs with a bowl of Chinese leftovers? Yes please!

I always thought the stigma was so stupid. That led to lots of conversations like:
(at a restaurant with a date)
Jillian: I met this guy online!
Waiter: Uh, I just need to know if you want a refill.

Mina January 20, 2010 at 1:02 pm

I met my husband through a MUDD (text based MMO). We had been playing in the game together for almost a year before we actually met in real life. We were totally best friends and pretty much already in love with each other before we “met”. That’s probably why we knew we’d be getting married after spending a week together. We’ve been married now for 5 years and I am prego with our second child.

One of my really good friends also married her husband of 11 years and had 3 kids with him in the same game.

Faith January 20, 2010 at 1:57 pm

Well, I met YOU online, and you helped me through many a night when I was dealing with the dates I found online. And off, for that matter. :D

Leo and I met the old fashioned way, i.e. at a bar. But of course I’d gone through my online dating shenanegans prior to meeting him and settling down, and I never had any issue with meeting men that way. I remember i being somewhat taboo, though, and looking back on that I just can’t help but see the silliness in feeling that way about it!

jesser January 20, 2010 at 3:00 pm

We met the old fashioned way … at a bar. Just kidding, it was actually far geekier … we were in the same volunteer organization. SCIENCE VOLUNTEER ORGANIZATION. Yeesh, our poor kids. But I know several married couples who met online. I think it’s awesome and I keep urging my sister to check it out, but she’s weirded out by it.

Kellie January 20, 2010 at 4:02 pm

Met my hubby because of online, didn’t actually meet online. We met at a party which was hosted because of a shared love of hockey. We were all part of a message board. Hubby and I hadn’t actually “talked” online, but did at the party and did more online afterwards.

Why is it that is weirder than meeting at, say, a bar?

Staz January 20, 2010 at 10:12 pm

Husband and I met 10 years ago on a horrible free dating site complete with flashing banners. Before our first date, my co-workers insisted I buy a pre-paid calling card and take mace because as they put it, “Only serial killers date on the internet!”
There was such a taboo. For nearly a year we lied to people about how we met. “A science convention..” or “Classes at college..”
Now that it’s so common to meet via the web, we’re all obnoxious about it when asked. “We met via the internet.. BEFORE it was cool.”

PiquantMolly January 20, 2010 at 11:08 pm

I met Ms. Pru online. Does that count?

Suzanne January 21, 2010 at 3:07 pm

I met my husband on Match.com 7 years ago. We’ve been married for 5. He turned out to be fairly less douche’y than most of the fix-ups my friends coordinated. And they actually knew those guys.

Siera January 21, 2010 at 10:48 pm

My fiance and I met in a Yahoo! chat room in 2000. We emailed and instant msg’d (ICQ) each other for 2 years then he got posted out west and I brought a girlfriend with me to meet him (in another city) and we started dating that fall. We never intended to date each other, we just met in person and clicked.

geohde January 24, 2010 at 5:13 am

Met through a colleague. Hit it off. Had it off in short order.

Then had two interstate moves, three IVF’s one dead baby and two living ones. Now tolerate each other.

Marriage. eh? ;)


royann January 26, 2010 at 11:12 am

My husband and I met online in 96. My roommate and I got home from the bar, and decided (very drunk) that we should place an ad on AOL, since I had had some bad dates. I expected nothing to come of it, but some laughs.
We chatted a week or so, and found out we had mutual friends, went to our first date (Padre game) and have been together ever since. We married in 2001. I remember after I got home from our first date I had to call everyone I knew to tell them I was alive and he had not chopped me into tiny bits and threw me in a freezer.

April January 31, 2010 at 3:58 am

As you know, we met via Flickr – though it turned out our parents knew each other and we had no idea that the other existed. To this day, I still tell people we met through a “photography club” rather than “online.”

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