Magical Vending Machines

by statia on January 20, 2010

Has anyone ever seen the episode of Seinfeld where Jerry writes something down in his half sleep, and spends the rest of the episode trying to remember what the fuck he was talking about?

As an aside,  any life situation can be associated with Seinfeld and Family Guy.  I’m convinced.

Also, at one point in time, I was a Seinfeld trivia genius.   I had a book and everything.  And I had that shit aced.   Because I feel the need to clog up my brain with useless knowledge, like that.

And I wonder why I suck at math.

Anyway,  last night, I had something funny that I was writing out in my head, and I didn’t want to forget it.  So I wrote it down.  Unfortunately (for you, or for me, is what’s to be decided yet), it was dark and I ended up writing it over some other writing.  I know it was about fairies.  What kind of fairies, I can’t tell you.  I know it sounded amusing in my head, which probably means it was lame.

So instead, I’ll share with you, a blurb from an email my sister sent me.  Given that she was probably hopped up on 47mg of Ativan to make the trek to Japan, she sounds oddly coherent:

I’ll start a flickr account tomorrow. I need some pictures of the fucking random vending machines there are everywhere. Seriously, I have no idea where they plug these things in. It’s funny. I saw one literally outside of someone’s front door. That’s just really convenient and awkward at the same time.

I’m sure people come to this country and think that we have weird cultural things, or weird shit we do.  Like ten gallon hats,  or New Jersey.   But the vending machine thing, much like Cat Shit One, I can’t get past it.  It’s just too funny, and bizarre.

{ 6 comments }

Beth January 20, 2010 at 9:02 pm

My sister has traveled extensively in Japan and has told me all about the vending machines. Apparently you can by UNDERWEAR in a vending machine, right next to a bizzarly flavored Kit Kat bar. It’s almost worth traveling there just to see it in person.

statia January 20, 2010 at 9:25 pm

OMG. I’m talking to my sister right now and she was JUST saying the same thing!!!

Faith January 21, 2010 at 11:42 am

I’ve heard of those random vending machines, too. Anthony Bourdain has visited one or two of them in shows past. Fascinating.

My friends Alisha and Lloyd used to tell stories of the beer vending machine in their apartment building they lived in overseas…I think someplace in Germany, but I can’t recall exactly. Anyway, THAT is a vending machine I can get on board with!!!

Tracy January 21, 2010 at 1:36 pm

Great. Now I have to put “Vending Machine Tour of Japan” on my list of things to do before I die.

Jen R. (emeraldsunshine.org) January 22, 2010 at 10:29 am

I absolutely love traveling to different places, but the more places I go the more I seem to see things that are the same. I’d love to go to a truly different culture and experience something wildly different – like Japan.

Christine January 23, 2010 at 3:33 pm

I hate when that happens. Right before Thanksgiving I had this great idea in the middle of the night. It was something about Caesar Salad prepared like a Caesarian – I don’t know. It was hysterical at the time, I assure you. Now I can’t remember what the hell I was thinking.

And I had no idea about the vending machines. I think that would be awesome.

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