It’s just a fantasy.

by statia on January 5, 2010

I’ve never been a good sleeper.  I have a hard time falling asleep and if I wake up, I have a hard time going back to sleep.   It’s my brain.  It runs like a 33 record on 78 speed (not that I’m dating myself much, here) all the time, and even more so when I lay down to catch my daily dose of z’s.   I’ve tried everything  to slow my brain down to a respectable “Sunday drive” speed.   Aside of drugs, it seems that the only thing that works, is to create a fantasy land in my head.   I figure, if I’m going to have to think while falling asleep.  I might was way think about something that is happy, and completely unrealistic.

Like being married to some hot celebrity who does housework because “of COURSE I could hire a housekeeper, baby, but you know how much I love to clean.”   *swoon*

Pretending I’m on vacation doesn’t really do much for me.  I mean, there’s only so much envisioning of a white sandy beach I can do in my life.

And you can take your multiplication tables to hell.   I want to relax and go to sleep, not do math.

Share your falling asleep secrets.


Kate January 5, 2010 at 12:18 pm

Obsessive iPhone games. Not ones with storylines, but sudoku on the Expert level or really hard solitaire games. Usually after just one (two if it’s not as hard), my brain is clear enough to sleep. Anything rote helps me calm down.

donna January 5, 2010 at 12:33 pm

I sing the ABC song over and over and over until I bore myself to sleep. If my brain starts to wander from that, I make myself imagine each letter in different fonts until I finally fall asleep. Doesn’t work EVERY time but most of the time except when I’m extremely anxious.

Amy January 5, 2010 at 12:49 pm

I follow Eckhart Tolle’s meditation method: watch my breathing. The 3rd paragraph here explains it in detail:

Goooooooooood stuff.

Hannah January 5, 2010 at 12:50 pm

Audio books. They’re perfect for long drives because I pay enough attention that I don’t get bored or fall asleep… yet in bed, they will put me to sleep within 30 minutes, guaranteed.

Mina January 5, 2010 at 1:25 pm

I pretend I am asleep and just dreaming consciousness. I’m pretty sure this is not an original method.

martha January 5, 2010 at 1:33 pm

It was years ago that I used to do this and just tried it again last night and it still works – I build an imaginary GIANT ice cream cone. It defies the laws of what can fit in my stomach and how many scoops you can get on a cone but I can think hard about what flavors should go next to what and rearrange. The trick is to keep making myself think back to the beginning scoop. Last night it was vanilla, strawberry, chocolate, banana, butter pecan… and that’s as far as I got because I did so much rearranging of flavors. Still not perfect but there it is…

And now I’m going to have to steal this idea from you and put this on my blog because I haven’t written in eons and think this is a great discussion topic.

PiquantMolly January 5, 2010 at 4:29 pm

The other day to fall asleep I tried to name every town and city I could think of in my home state. And then I tried to do so for other states. Realized I could only think of 3 cities in all of Oklahoma, and 2 in Vermont and Maine. Hmmm.

And then I started getting obsessed about cities and looking at all of my products and seeing where they were made and I created this little creepy head game that for every town I named, I was saving the population of that town from being destroyed by some evil psychopath so I had to name EVERY CITY I COULD POSSIBLY THINK OF OR DEATH! DEATH AND DESTRUCTION!!

On second thought, you may not want to try that.

Faith January 5, 2010 at 5:24 pm

I have the same issues with falling asleep once I’ve woken up in the middle of the night, and it’s also when I tend to get my scary images in my head when I close my eyes. (I’ve been told that they’re my spirit guides, which is fine, but sometimes, they get a little too close to me for my comfort, is all. And then it’s like a giant old person’s face is in my face, and I wind up all, “Dude! Back it up old person! What do you want, being all close to me like that???” But they never answer. Which makes them pretty shitty spirit guides, if you ask me.)

I have a “happy place” that I go to, though I’m not sure where or when I got the idea and started doing it. It’s a very short thought…it’s the woodsy scene from Emma (w/ Gwyneth Paltrow) where she’s running up to Mr. Knightly after she’s offended him by stopping him from telling her that he loves her, because she thought he was going to tell her that he loved Miss Smith instead. Stoopid Emma. Anyway, The wooded walk they’re on, next to a little stream, with the big trees all around them, on such a pretty spring day…it’s my happy place. And inevitably, it makes me feel happy, peaceful, and I fall asleep.

Um, longest comment EVAR. Sorry! :)

ssfb January 5, 2010 at 5:44 pm

Oh see, not me, I could sleep for days. I slept for 9 hours last night and still spent the day feeling like I was half asleep. I’d like to know how I could wake up easier!

statia January 6, 2010 at 6:42 pm

I might have to hate you a little for that. :o )

Shelly January 5, 2010 at 7:47 pm

When my mind won’t shut off, I do this thing I learned in yoga in college (100 years ago). I lay there and start at one foot, then I concentrate on feeling my foot laying on the mattress. Feeling the feel of my skin against the mattress. I’m having a hard time explaining it. So I start at the foot and work my way up the leg (I’m usually on my side so only have to worry about one leg) and focus on where my body touches the mattress. The point is supposed to be that by the time you get to your head, your mind will have shut off and shut up so you can go to sleep. Doesn’t always work for me but sometimes it does. Also, deep breathing (the kind that makes your belly poof out, not your lungs) while doing this helps. Sometimes.

Or lots of liquor.

Merrin January 5, 2010 at 8:35 pm

I list all 50 states in alphabetical order. If that fails, I do the state capitals. I have the WORST time falling asleep, but this will usually do the trick, because, dude. It’s HARD to think of all 50 states. There are like 30 of ‘em that start with “M”. ;-)

Jesser January 6, 2010 at 1:00 am

Audio books on my MP3 player (set to turn off in 15 min) … I almost never have to have a second 15 min …

Tracy January 6, 2010 at 11:08 am

Funny, I have the same problem. I lay there and imagine I won the lottery, and build my dream home in my head.

Shannon January 6, 2010 at 11:35 am



Vary the ratios of the two.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

ewe_are_here January 6, 2010 at 4:59 pm

I am an insomniac and struggle to sleep/stay asleep; I struggle to turn off’ my brain. I’ve found it helps to keep the radio on very quietly next to me, a BBC news/talkradio station or watch put a mindless tv show on and listen to it (have to cover my eyes, though, if I opt for the tv)

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