It was inevitable

by statia on January 11, 2010

I hear the “bad quiet,” followed by a howling cry.   I dash into the dining room, which is not really the dining room, but more like a catchall room for “crap that I have,” to see what happened.  I see the Mini standing there looking guilty and LG screaming at the top of her lungs.


The Mini is not at the age yet where he understands the ability to lie, thereby throwing himself under the bus on a regular basis.

“I hit LG.”

The next two minutes were a cacophony of wails and cries from both kids as one was sent to the step to sit, and the other was crying from whatever it is her brother did to her.    The chaos brought the Meester flying up the steps.

By and large, my friends are jealous of the sibling relationship between my kids.   And I have to say, the Mini is really good with LG for the most part, but I don’t really expect that he’ll be perfect.  Especially now that she’s into his stuff.   He’s learned to find ways to redirect her in different directions, but there are going to be times where he just pushes the limits to see what he can get away with.   This is part of learning to interact with other people.  This is part of growing up.

But it’s hard to yell at one kid over the other, or in front of the other.  No matter what their ages are.   I don’t want either of them to think that they are favored, nor do I want them to think that they can use that as ammunition against the other (“MOM, SHE HIT ME!”), but I know that’s inevitable too.   Perhaps this is delusional thinking, or perhaps this is just because I know all of the things I did to my sister as a kid.

I mean, seriously.  I put a leash on her and walked her around because my mother wouldn’t let me have a dog.  And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

I once forced her to eat a wad of paper, because she stuck it to the door that my mother had just taken two days to repaint.

I used to try to wedge her nose so far up my crack and then rip a fart.

I locked her out of the house during a thunderstorm (oh and boy did I pay for that severely when she saw that my parents happened to be driving down the street at the time).

Now it’s your turn.  I want to hear your sibling abuse stories.


donna January 11, 2010 at 11:01 pm

Oh god, I was always on the receiving end from my older brother. But one time, when I was 10, he was picking at me and picking at me and just being mean, and I was pre-pubescent so hormones were probably raging. We had a long galley kind of kitchen and he was at one end and I was at the other. I picked up a pair of kitchen tongs on the counter next to me and threw them at him. Cut the side of his head, and there was debate about whether stitches were needed. He pretty much left me alone after that.

Donna January 12, 2010 at 2:07 am

Whee, I’m Donna #2! I’m the youngest of four, with twin brothers 7 years older than me, so I was often literally a football or other ball that you throw back and forth between boys just for fun. One of my brothers pushed me off the not-finished-yet carport when I was 5 or 6 and I fell 15 feet and landed on a bicycle and was rushed to the ER (I was OK, he got the strap). Ah childhood. Good times.

Anita January 12, 2010 at 6:56 am

My brother is 3 yearsyounger than me and was the brunt of my abuse for years.

My favorite torture was to pin him down on the floor, holding hisshulders down with my knees and dangle spit over his face.

PiquantMolly January 12, 2010 at 11:54 am

Oh god, my sister and I were vicious to each other.

I remember her throwing a high heeled shoe at my head. So I pushed her into the clothes hamper and tipped it over. Lots of biting, scratching, etc.

Shannon January 12, 2010 at 1:26 pm

I once emptied the dishwasher and threw every single item I unloaded at my sister (lucky for her, this was during my mother’s Tupperware phase).

A year later my sister threw a bunch of steak knives at me. This was when my mother was in her steak knife phase. I rather wished we could go back to Tupperware.

Amy January 12, 2010 at 1:35 pm

First – I love your attitude of neutrality regarding your kids. I always immediately felt sorry for the one getting hit and wanted to kill the other one. LOL

Your sibling stories and those in the comments are cracking me up. I have some good ones, although the best one is probably pretty long.

I have a twin brother and a sister who is 5 years younger than us. My brother and I fought with some regularity – your basic run-of-the-mill punching of each other in the back when the other walked away type stuff.

My little sister, however, was the brunt of much torture – mostly psychological. We convinced her the utility closet with the water heater was haunted by taking turns hiding in there and making noises while the other walked her by it at opportune times. To this day she does not like to walk by that closet. We “changed her name” from Jen to John when she continually wet the bed. (Get it?) We also nick-named her Pesty and refused to call her by any other name except perhaps John for years unless we were in front of adults.

One time my brother and I were over at the next-door neighbor’s house hanging out. My sister came over, walked in without knocking then proceeded to take a piece of fruit off the kitchen table and eat it. We all looked at her aghast for a few moments and then my neighbor (6 years older than my brother & I) went to work. He said, “Hungry, Jen?? Want some cookies?” She, of course, wanted some. He handed her an Oreo laced with pepper (unbeknownst to her) and she began chomping it down… then sputtering… then yelling, “It’s hot!! It’s hot!!!” The neighbor said, “It’s hot? Are you thirsty??” He gave her some lemonade spiked with a ton of salt and handed it to her. She gulped it down, then almost threw it back up before running home to tell on us. Fun times. :-)

solonor January 12, 2010 at 6:14 pm

With 4 boys, my mother deserved sainthood. The #2 brother had a vicious temper, and he regularly did things like sit on me and make me eat grass and dirt, throw croquet balls at us, and try to drown #3.

Tracy January 13, 2010 at 12:10 am

My brothers are 5 and 7 years older than me. For some unknown reason, I idolized them, and always wanted to be around them. As you can imagine, the LAST thing they wanted, especially as teenagers, was their baby sister hanging around. One afternoon, one of them had a bunch of friends over, and they were all hanging out downstairs playing darts. I, having no sense of self-preservation, kept trying to hang out down there with them. Finally, my brother got mad, and threw a dart at me, as I tried to run away. Apparently he has pretty good aim, as I still have a scar in the back of my thigh from that stupid dart.

Huy January 13, 2010 at 7:28 pm

When I lived with my cousin (who’s like a sister) she would eat really slowly. So when my aunt said if she didn’t finish before me, she’d get a spanking, I inhaled my food in like 30 seconds. Yeah, she got it. With a wire hanger. I kinda felt bad about that….

Fawn January 14, 2010 at 5:42 am

I have a brother that’s a year younger than me. When he was about 7 (back when moms still ran into stores and left kids in cars) I’d wait until she was out of sight,turn sideways in the seat facing him and use my feet to smash him up against the door until he cried. When I saw my mom coming I’d tell him he would get in trouble for crying and he better suck it up,quick. When he was 14 he towered over me at 6’1 and 260 lbs…he beat the hell out of me with an empty pringles can.I guess he got his revenge LOL

diamond dave January 16, 2010 at 12:21 pm

Being the youngest, I tended to be the abusee rather than the abuser. My sister gave me abandonment issues by telling me our parents were NEVER coming back whenever they went out by themselves. My brother used to make me close my eyes and make me taste crap out of the refrigerator and pantry, usually the most vile-tasting stuff. Years later I actually shuddered when I saw that tasting scene out of Nine 1/2 Weeks, particularly when he gave her cough medicine.

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