Shades of brown

by statia on December 11, 2009

A few weeks ago, I was changing the Mini’s diaper, and I lamented to him that he had, what we in this house refer to, as a “crayon sleeve.”    You know, the butt looks clean, but you wipe 6,000 times and still get poo.

Fast forward a couple of days and the Meester is changing the Mini’s diaper and the Mini says to the Meester:

“Daddy, I have a crayon in my butt!”

Kids, I tell ya.

One of the Mini’s teachers once told me that the two things she feared the most in regards to child rearing is potty training, and teaching her kids to drive, and boy, there was never a truer statement right there.   Granted, the Mini will be 3 in March, so he is still young, but I have dreaded the thought of potty training this kid.  Every person I know with a boy, has told me the hell they’ve gone through trying to get their kid to go on the potty.    It has scarred me and I’ve been putting off even starting.

There was a period of time where he was waking up from his naps dry, so one day, I decided to try my hand at letting him sit on his little chair with a cup full of whole juice (rather than watered down, as we would normally give him).   And OH, the DRAMA that ensued from that one episode.  You’d have thought we were beating him with chains.

I know there are the types of people that believe in potty training boot camp.  Where, you stay home for a week, and strip them down, to just underwear, taking them every hour.

That would not work in this house,  especially these days where everything is “NO, I DON’T WANT TO!”  Which is followed by kicking and much screaming.

Then there’s the other type who gradually sit them on the potty and ease into it slowly.

At this point, I’d prefer the former, but I know it would be a giant disaster.  We’re dealing with an incredibly smart kid, who still has problems communicating, and add extreme stubbornness on top of that, along with a dash of not wanting to man up to the responsibility to actually have to think about stopping to go.

Which leaves me at a loss.  The bottom line is that it’s a control issue and I can’t make him go, but even if I could, I have no idea where to start.  All I know is that I’m over having two kids in diapers.


donna December 11, 2009 at 6:19 pm

My favorite advice on this topic, and what I am choosing to follow, is that you just talk to them a whole bunch about it, show him some cool underpants he can wear when he learns to put his pee and poop in the potty, let him go in with you guys and then just step away. He won’t learn until he wants to so don’t try to force it. He has to think it’s his idea.

Aunt Becky December 11, 2009 at 9:08 pm

Alex is the same exact way. And I’ll be damned before I go head to head with him because really? How the hell am I going to MAKE him do that? Really? I can’t.

So I won’t.

Instead, we talk about it and when he’s ready, he’ll do it. Until then, I’ll be furiously wiping the poo crayon with you.

Fawn December 12, 2009 at 3:29 am

I heard all the same horror stories when my son was born. He’s 5 now and I’m happy to say he is potty trained but it was definately on his just about everything he’s ever done. He followed along with some of the stereotypical “boy potty training issues” he peed in the toilet without an accident for a year before he ever decided pooping in there would be acceptable. He was 4 when that was finally,magically ok with him. He would say “I really want a skateboard” I’d say “I really want you to poop in the toilet” he would say “no thanks”
One night he said he really wanted that lightsaber he saw at walmart and I laughed and said no way am I paying for a 20 dollar toy you are going to use to poke your sister’s eye out….unless of course you poop in the toilet. I’d found the right bargaining tool,apparently, because I then found myself at walmart at 10pm while he announced to everyone in the store that he POOPED IN THE POTTY. I love the kid but he was definately sent from the future to destroy me!

statia December 12, 2009 at 8:19 pm

Haha. My mother tried to bribe me six ways from Tuesday and it didn’t work. I went when I was damn good and ready. Or maybe she just tied me to the chair.

Melissa December 12, 2009 at 1:46 pm

We had the same meltdown. I have just given up all together. It is so frustrating having two in diapers but it is even more frustrating having one melt down every time you want them to go on the “potty”!!

ewe_are_here December 12, 2009 at 5:40 pm

I’m hoping it will go smoothly with BooBaaa, who is just a few days younger than Mini. He’s decided to be the opposite of most children, and has started with pooing on the toilet. In August, he decided on his own (since I certainly didn’t have the time or energy, what with the new baby!) that he would no longer poo in his pants, and save for one accident (he was mortified), he has ever since only used the toilet for pooing. All on his own (save for some help getting his clothes off, sometimes. He likes to poo naked; strange boy.) Because he’ll randomly pee on it as well, I’m going to give ‘full potty training’ a go over the holidays when my sister is here, since I’ll be able to give him the time and attention it requires over a few days. Wish us luck!

electriclady December 12, 2009 at 11:01 pm

You are right to fear the potty training. We have been at it for 6 full months and were 90% there when she had a massive regression last month. You know what’s worse than changing poopy diapers? Trying to get poopy underpants off a squirming child without getting poop all over her legs. Sigh.

Mina December 17, 2009 at 8:22 am

In my situation, it’s totally us that are at fault. My son loves the idea of wearing underwear and being a big boy (thank god to daycare for that), our issue is he’s not good at telling me BEFORE he has to go. But with all the craziness in our life, if I actually asked him periodically to go, he might manage to do it better. At daycare, they have him down to 2 pull ups a DAY, and that’s mainly poopy ones. I fail as a parent :/

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