In the running for parent of the year.

by statia on July 22, 2008

Last week, very suddenly and out of the blue, the Mini decided to FREAK out during diaper changes. I thought maybe he had something wrong with the man junk, because he was kicking and screaming during a simple wipe down.

I finally got him to calm down after a few days of letting him know, “quick quick” followed by “all done.” Along with handing him a knife or some turpentine that he isn’t normally allowed to have, you know, something to distract him.

And then on Friday, we were at the pool, and I was changing him into a swim diaper and accidentally pinched the mushroom cap. And of course, rightfully so, he lost his shit completely.

And now, not only do I feel like a prize asshole, but a prize asshole that has to start all over again.

Good times.


Deltus July 22, 2008 at 8:17 am

I just cringed so hard, my own mushroom cap just tried to hide inside me. *shudder*

Fawn July 22, 2008 at 10:34 am

Imagine him doing that everytime you take him through the doors to the doc’s office..I’m not talking a small flip son does a good impression of Regan.Speaking 7 languages and screaming “DON’T TOUCH ME” in all of them while his head spins all the way around.This, while he’s dragging me back outside with his super human oh-hell-no strength. There’s no explanation for this but boy does it make me feel like crap. Kids are odd little creatures.

Faith July 22, 2008 at 11:51 am

Wait…I’m a girl, and have a lack of experience when it comes to boy babies.

What does this mean? This pinching of mushroom caps? Apparently, it’s something bad, but I’m clueless!

tricia July 22, 2008 at 2:21 pm

“mushroom cap”, now there’s a word you can torture him with when he’s older.

Helen July 23, 2008 at 3:20 am

I’m dreading the day I accidentally rack mine. It’ll be bad.

Tracy July 23, 2008 at 7:58 am

Ok, y’all are making me really hope this baby isn’t a boy. I’ve never had to change one of those…and…the whole circumcision debate just makes my head spin.

tracey July 25, 2008 at 11:50 am

If its any consolation, my guy is 21 months old, and for about two weeks now, same thing. Arched back, banging his head, screaming all through the diaper change, trying to thrust his hands down there regardless of what lurks. WTF ??

I think it has less to do with the diaper change than not wanting to be disturbed from whatever it is he is doing at the moment – torturing the cat, climbing on the toilet TANK and rearranging the art on the wall, climbing onto the kitchen island for knives, you know the routine.

I am hating this and hope it is over soon.

Matt July 28, 2008 at 5:01 pm

I thank jeebuz yet again that mine will be a girl :) Two months, 12 days to go

Christine July 30, 2008 at 9:34 pm

OMG, I have to stop blogging now. I was writing to keep myself amused in the ten adult seconds I have a day…but I peed myself reading some of your entries and now I know I should just read your stuff instead of being a hack.

If it helps, btw, one night about two years ago, I was half asleep and changing my boy. Grabbed the diaper and pulled it quickly up to avoid the full fire hose effect a new diaper seems to have on a boy, and realized I had grabbed boy parts along with the waistband. Maybe leaving the elephant trunk on was a bad idea because I pulled that sucker all the way to his waist before I realized what I had done.
I cried. And told my mom. She listed every one of MY body parts that the little bastard has damaged (nipples, exit portal, and mental capacity amongst them) and told me that he owed me one and I should probably repeat the Stretch Armstrong bit every night to get back at him.
Interesting. Wonder why my brother and I turned out the way we did.
Thanks for the blog.

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