Two Midgets walk into a bar…

by statia on December 9, 2007

The Mini had his 9 month well baby check up on Friday. I was eagerly anticipating this because A. I didn’t think he would be getting any shots (I was wrong) and B. I wanted to see how much this kid weighed, because it’s now to the point where he wants me to cart him around in my arms all day, and my arms? They’re going numb from carting him around all day. There’s just some heft there, is all I’m saying.

Before I get to the point where I tell you about our freakishly tall baby, I’ll tell you, I’m never again taking my child to a doctors appointment by myself, because HOLY JESUS, I needed a nap after that ordeal. We now have bucking, and writhing and repeated yanking of equipment off the wall, and I got a raging case of swamp ass, and normally, the swamp ass is reserved for when I’m dreading getting some sort of procedure done, or when I’m taking the time to dry my hair. It was as if someone slipped some meth into his chicken squash at lunch. But I digress.

The Mini weighs in at a nice 21.1lbs and is 29½” long. Which means, that not only has my son grown 11 inches in his short little life, but is in the 90th percentile for height, which, is quite amazing, given the fact that he’s got two short parents. I’m sure he’ll level off at some point, he’s been all over the mark for height, but I was like “BEHOLD, my freakishly tall baby, produced from midget parents.” And then I held him up so that the white light could flow behind him and angels started singing. And then my fingers went numb, because holy heavy baby.

I also noticed last week, that he’s starting to lean out and lose his wrist chub. No longer is he like the couch cushions, where I lose change and small animals in his wrists. It makes me die a little inside at how fast he’s growing.


robyn December 9, 2007 at 8:40 pm

Freakishly tall to you maybe, shawty – but I just looked up N’s 9 month stats out of curiousity…

31 ½” tall and 24 lbs., 3 oz.

N was 29½” and 20 lbs. even at his 6-month checkup. ;-p Enjoy it though – I’m truly, honestly jealous! It really stinks to have a 3-year old in boys size XS(5) and S(6)!

Cannot believe how fast Mini’s growing!!!

Tonya December 9, 2007 at 8:55 pm

Healthy boy ya got there! I’m a total sucker for the Michelin Man-esque babes. It comes as no surprise that he’s lapped Tiny Boy (17 lb. @ 17 mos. (long and skinny, my boy).

Hoping he has no reaction from his shots, and that your, um, regional discomfort clears up soon.

MsPrufrock December 9, 2007 at 11:47 pm

My tiny little sprite is only just 21 lbs now at almost 17 mos, and she’s a short ass like her parents. I can see where the Mini’s heft would leave your arms numb. Let’s just hope he starts walking soon, eh?

Though now I think of it, P still needs picked up all the damn time despite having mastered walking. Nevermind, you are fucked. Or, as I initally typed it, “you are fuck.” Haha. That too perhaps.

Suz December 10, 2007 at 5:24 am

That is one HEAVY baby! And we’re two tall parents with kids in the 35% for height, so go figure!

Suz December 10, 2007 at 5:25 am

That is one HEAVY baby! And we’re two tall parents with kids in the 35% for height, so go figure!

Deltus December 10, 2007 at 8:05 am

Start checking his waning fat folds for loose change! Otherwise they’ll just fall out when you’re at the store and stuff. :)

DD December 11, 2007 at 8:13 am

As long as Guinness Book of World Records doesn’t come to your door, you’re doing OK.

You could try stacking books on Mini’s head to stunt him.

jesser December 11, 2007 at 9:10 am

We don’t do a well baby checkup at 9 months which is great because she always seems to get sick when she goes to the doc’s … BLECH.

She went all long and lean for a while and is now getting some chub back … around 17 lbs last time I weighed her and I really want her to pack on a few pounds so I can put her forward facing at her first b’day. I think she would enjoy car rides more. :P

Chris Cactus December 14, 2007 at 6:37 am

It’s pretty amazing how fast it goes. It’s a little sad to see them start to lose the chub.

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