Answering my true calling – interior design

by statia on September 14, 2007

Once your sweet sweet baby starts rolling around in their crib, are you paranoid? Do you take your bumpers out? Are you like me where you incessantly poke your husband and say “babe, can you go check on him to make sure he’s breathing? I know it’s only been ten minutes”, even though you have a swanky monitor with a built in motion detector that you know for a fact works, because you still haven’t learned, after six months, to turn the damn thing off, forcing obscenities to come out of your mouth every time you hear the warning beep (“son of a…”)? We took the bumpers out after we kept finding him with is face up against them, which seemed like such a waste of money, given how much we spent on that set.

Now that he’s rolling, we’ve found a way to get more use out of it. We tied it to the armoire so that he wouldn’t roll into or under it. Not only are we recycling, but it gives the family room a nice touch, let me tell you.


DD September 14, 2007 at 12:11 pm

I went nutso on our bedding, too. What a bloody waste! I could have spent it on a fabulous pair of shoes instead.

Love the Baby Lump. I think for the fall you should decorate it with some mini pumpkins and keep it on the dining room table.

thalia September 14, 2007 at 12:30 pm

the real question about that picture is not what you did with the bumper, but what the baby is up to in that rather odd position?!

thalia September 14, 2007 at 12:31 pm

the real question about that picture is not what you did with the bumper, but what the baby is up to in that rather odd position?!

thalia September 14, 2007 at 12:32 pm

the real question about that picture is not what you did with the bumper, but what the baby is up to in that rather odd position?!

MsPrufrock September 14, 2007 at 2:20 pm

Wow, Thalia really wants to know what that baby is doing, doesn’t she? Once would suffice Thalia, once would suffice.

If removal of the crib bumpers at his age makes you paranoid, what am I? When staying with my Dad’s girlfriend in Philly, using her grandson’s crib with a bumper, I took it out right away. You know, afraid that my walking, very mobile child would suffocate in it.

Fucking SIDS insanity has ruined my life.

tricia September 14, 2007 at 3:22 pm

i miss that baby lump!

Jenn September 14, 2007 at 6:06 pm

My guys are 13 months old and still have their bumpers, one of the ties has been torn off and it’s smooshed down in the corner where they stand on it. I don’t even have the monitor.

I’m surprised they’ve lasted this long.

I think you should market the Baby Lump.

erika September 14, 2007 at 6:23 pm

When we hit that point, I went out and bought the BreathableBaby Bumper. It was fantastic, and was in his crib until we switched him over to a bed last month.

K&M September 14, 2007 at 7:17 pm

Max rolled under the couch this week. Well, his head was still out but he was MAD. He doesn’t roll much when he sleeps yet, but it won’t be long now!

Meredith September 15, 2007 at 12:09 pm

You are brilliant! I didn’t get a crib bumper for this very reason and then my baby ended up refusing to sleep in the crib anyway. But I could seriously use about 10 bumpers around the house for various items of furniture. Brilliant, I tell you! (But boy won’t those Pottery Barn bumpers I like cost a pretty penny times 10.)

Camille September 15, 2007 at 5:00 pm

Haha! Baby lump.

ewe_are_here September 16, 2007 at 5:07 am

Ah, we never even bothered with crib bumpers; they even say you shouldn’t leave the wee one in the cot sleeping with bumpers on…supposed to take them off. We just use sheets to put under the wee one and a sleeping bag to pop him into. :-)

Baby Boo keeps crawling backwards and getting stuck under the furniture… and he’s starting to get some forward motion in now, too. I’m kind of bummed…I was hoping for a little more ‘just sitting’ action for a bit. Instead, I’m rescuing him from underneath furniture and far corners of the room. Sigh.

watson September 16, 2007 at 3:11 pm

I also got the totally cute bumper that came with Caden Lane crib set I bought, but I know I better enjoy staring at it now before the babies are even born, cause I’m so paranoid I’m sure I’ll rip it out the second they move to the crib…

Happy fall in PA, enjoy the beautiful colors that we N. Californians don’t get much of!

michele September 16, 2007 at 9:49 pm

baby lump. heh. and you are one mighty clever woman using that bumper to block the armoire like that. my babe had the bumper in his crib until the day we moved him to the toddler bed. he kept getting his legs stuck between the slats otherwise. I just wove the bumper in and out every second slat to make sure it was tight. and here I thought I was clever…

Faith September 17, 2007 at 10:55 am

Jesus. Didn’t know babies rolled around this much. I mean, I’ve seen them move around, and all…but this seems really obnoxious!

And the ass on that baby bump is just about the cutest thing I’ve seen in a long while! CUTE!

Motel Manager September 17, 2007 at 11:42 am

I never put on our really cute bumpers. After our son started moving around a bit, I did put on the much less stylish (but presumably less death-trappy) Breathable Bumpers. I was thinking I should sell the cute bumpers on eBay, but maybe I should use them to block passage underneath heavy furniture. Wahoo!

PS: Cute baby lump

jesser September 17, 2007 at 7:08 pm

Hehe. This cracks me up. We haven’t taken her bumpers out … don’t know if we will, but maybe when she gets to that crawling phase. I’ve heard they make good steps. :P

Deltus September 17, 2007 at 9:28 pm

The people who market baby supplies like that and charge an arm and a leg for it are fucking whore bastard. Cause they know you’ll pay it.

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