Did you ever see that movie Scanner’s where the guy’s head explodes?

by statia on April 18, 2007

Our long term plan was always to move back to my old stomping grounds, eventually. We had never put a date on it. It was always a “someday” sort of thing, while in the meantime, we continued to drive ourselves certifiably insane living in California. It’s the drivers. I swear, everything you see in the movies is true. They really do drive that horribly. That and the consideration of others, as in, there is none. But I digress. I could go on and on, but it would take up all of the webspace we pay for, and let me tell you, it’s a lot. That and well, currently, there is a sleeping child in a certain neglect o’ matic, and I don’t think that’s going to last too long by the look of his face. That and we have dinner reservations at my favorite restaurant and there’s a god damned martini with my name on it.

When we found out that the Mini Me-ester was indeed on his way, we put a more finite date on it. As in, after our lease here was up, which was Juneish. Our landlord also decided about three months into our lease that he was selling our his place. And sometime right before Christmas, my company decided that once I left for maternity leave, that there wasn’t a position for me when I returned. All signs were pointing to yes, as far as this move goes. We were lucky to be able to secure a down payment for a house when we finally did decide to move, so really the only thing we needed was for the Meester to find a job, and for us to find a house.

I honestly thought the house part would be easier than the job part.

I laugh and laugh and laugh at my insane stupidity.

Now, granted, we’ve technically only been actively looking for a few weeks, and we really only spent three days out there, physically looking. Even our realtor thought we were high when we told her we thought we’d find something in the 5 days we were out there. I think we were high. Because now we’re in a crunch with the Meester actually finding a job, and are now essentially going to have to buy a house sight unseen.

I once saw a comedian who said something about dating as you got older and how your standards changed and by the time you hit 35, just a pulse would do.

It’s sort of like that right now, and I think we’re going to go insane.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go get sauced.


Gina April 18, 2007 at 5:15 pm

Do you have friends in the moving to area? Can they do some looking for you? I would be scared to buy a house sight unseen. Much much luck (and martini’s) to you guys in this process.

Pamela April 18, 2007 at 5:27 pm

Grey Goose gotcha loose?


Dooneybug April 18, 2007 at 5:48 pm

That’s a scary thought. I’d demand photo after photo of the houses you would consider from your realtor. Being in the age of digital they can hardly refuse.

karmajenn April 18, 2007 at 6:07 pm

Skip the martini. Just drop some olives in the vodka bottle. Works better that way.

robyn April 18, 2007 at 9:25 pm

Buying? Ho-ho. Very funny. Ha-ha. It is to laugh. Try SELLING right now. ;-p

SSFB April 19, 2007 at 5:46 am

You have GOT to know someone near where you’re moving? (With all these people religiously reading your blog?) Get someone to go with your realtor and take lots of pictures and poke around a bit (perferably a friend who has really high standards)

geeky April 19, 2007 at 7:41 am

oh man, just reading that makes me feel stressed. are you sure you only need one martini?

moi April 19, 2007 at 9:12 am

my mouth actually watered at the word ‘martini’.

Empress April 19, 2007 at 9:46 am

*cough cough* *ahem* Friend in the area *cough cough*

Just sayin’…

Lut C. April 19, 2007 at 1:20 pm

Buying a house without seeing it, no wonder you needs some sauce.

I take it leasing is insanely expensive?

Amy April 19, 2007 at 1:33 pm

What area are you looking in? I’m in Bucks County if I can help at all!

Watson April 19, 2007 at 9:25 pm

Wow, you have a LOT going on!

I’m dying to know where you’re moving to, is that public info you’ve posted about?

I ask because of course we’re living the crazy Calif. life too, bad drivers and all, so I get where you’re coming from!

GOOD LUCK with everything :-)

suzie April 19, 2007 at 10:37 pm

you’ll just have to move the whole family unit to pittsburgh and stay with us while you take your time to look. it’ll be great! small house, three dogs, three cats, four adults, two babies… it’ll be like a sitcom, only i have vodka AND a prescription pad, so it’ll be more fun than anything on tv.

Lenni April 20, 2007 at 6:35 am

Wow – that would definitely stress me out. Just keep your eye on the prize: proximity to a REAL cheesesteak! And WAWA. And Tastykakes.

just another jenny April 20, 2007 at 11:14 am

A new baby and moving across the country? I hope that luck is on your side.

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