The pooping fairy

by statia on November 7, 2006

One of the good things about this pregnancy is my ability to poop. I’m sorry to all you pregnant women I’m about to make jealous by saying this, but my ability to poop has increased two-fold. Ever since I found out I was pregnant, I’ve been like a cocker spaniel. At first it made me nervous, because all you hear about is women’s colons halting production as soon as they see their two pink lines. Of course a part of it is from the prenatal vitamins, but I’ve been take prenatals for so long, it really didn’t matter. But I still thought something was wrong.

Now I just take it for what it’s worth and chalk it up to Karma paying me back for the six months of anal fissures and pissing blood out of my ass last year.

Of course, I’m fully aware that things could change, but for now, I can poop and you can’t.

{ 13 comments }

jen November 7, 2006 at 9:08 pm

HAHAAA!

I had one or two small bouts with unpleasant pooping, nothing a little extra fiber couldn’t handle. The real crap (ha) happened after my surgery to remove the child.

Ohmygod. The gas. The pain. That first poop is a doozy, but when it is all done, yah feel like you just won the fucking lottery.

Wooo.

At least it was this way for me. They had me on Percocets for the pain and those things bind me up like cement! Next time (if there is a next time..) I think I will just deal with the pain, thankyouverymuch.

coloratura November 7, 2006 at 11:15 pm

okay, two words for ya, post partum-wise: flax seed

pound that crap when you’ve popped the kid, and things will continue to be smooth sailing.

it takes like nuts and you can put in cereal, smoothies, even sprinkle it in salads, etc.

your colon will looooove the flax seed and you can thank me later.

donna November 8, 2006 at 6:02 am

I had the slow colon at first, but as I near the end of pregnancy, my digestive system has become, shall we say, much more efficient? I am like clockwork now. Now my big fear is the big H so I religiously use the medicated wipes which I buy three packs at a time and my husband teases me for mercilessly.

jesser November 8, 2006 at 6:13 am

Sadly I’m in the other camp, but I’ve been eating that Activa yogurt most every day and it really helps. Stupid advertising worked on me … grrrrr

Chris November 8, 2006 at 6:30 am

Yay for pooping…I think. I don’t know. It’s too early to think about.

Robber Barren November 8, 2006 at 6:48 am

Oh, bite me.

geeky November 8, 2006 at 6:52 am

dude, i now know more about your pooping than i know about my best friend of more than 10 years, and i’ve never even met you! something is just not right about that.

Amy November 8, 2006 at 10:38 am

A cocker spaniel???? Hahaha! You crack me up.

Erin November 8, 2006 at 10:51 am

I wholeheartedly sedond the suggestion regarding flax. It’s like magic.

Dee November 8, 2006 at 11:42 pm

It’s only cause I eat a lot cheese dammit! Could be all those damn painkillers i’m on too…hmmmmm

Tom November 9, 2006 at 8:44 am

Do you know what else is good for pooping? Getting your gall bladder taken out.

Jenny November 9, 2006 at 1:02 pm

Oh, I hate you!
If one more person tells me it’s because of the prenatals, I scream – I’ve only been taking them for 3 yrs now.

robyn November 10, 2006 at 10:55 am

At least you’re getting the section so there’s no fear of pooping on the bed!

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