Why I blog about infertility

by statia on February 28, 2006

We all have one “friend” like this. Let’s call her “Ignorant Irene.”

: Did your shots work.
Moi: we start protocol next week
“friend”: Is that a new drug. Better watch it or you will have about 5 of those puppies..
Moi: it’s not possible
Moi: they don’t allow that to happen
“friend”: I will help you out if you have multiples…
Moi: two would be the max
“friend”: Really? Do thehy do selective reduction.
Moi: they only transfer two embryos.
Moi: rather than worry about high risk with multiples
Moi: the only time you’re in a multiple situation like that is if you’re just doing injections, not ivf.
Moi: ivf is controlled
Moi: they retrieve, fertilize and transfer
Moi: so they control the number they put back in
“friend”: Sounds sexy..
Moi: I’m sure my husband won’t be saying that when I’m stark raving mad on hormones
“friend”: I was really good during my pregnancy… Once threw up and all the rest pretty smooth till the nightmare of delivery…
Moi: well, this isn’t a guarantee.
“friend”: Do Keigal excercises. Start now as a matter of fact. Plus excercise during, it will really make a difference.
“friend”: Maybe not but it will most likely work…..How long will it take.
Moi: the protocol from start to finish is about three weeks
Moi: but we won’t find out until ten days post transfer about the results
Moi: but it’s only got a 50% chance of working
Moi: I have immunology issues
“friend”: Get a messgae and then have a glass of wine and then go to bed with hubs.
Moi: I can’t even drink on protocol

It’s just……taxing. And sad. Very sad, that there are people out there that actually think like this.


Camille February 28, 2006 at 6:34 pm

Then there are those of us are here to listen when you need an ear….

Anne February 28, 2006 at 6:42 pm

Her last message makes me want to smack my screen, just a little.

Jenn February 28, 2006 at 6:56 pm

I am SO SICK of people thinking you get litters with IVF. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve explained that I’d have…well enough to pay for IVF.

donna March 1, 2006 at 5:14 am

People are such idiots!

And I had to laugh a little because I am in the boat where I might get multiples since I have several follicles and will be doing IUI. I am the litter-carrier she is talking about!

Jenny March 1, 2006 at 5:22 am

And friends wonder why we eventually shut them out?
To bad she’s not right, I was really hoping for a litter of puppies.

Mrs. T March 1, 2006 at 7:35 am

I have a friend very similar. Where do we find them? She is a complete idiot when it comes to most things. I’m not sure how she even graduated college. She once told me to buy maternity clothes to motivate me. Like I need any more motivation. She also gave me the best ass-vice of propping your butt up after b/c that was how she was conceived… Ugh!

amy t. March 1, 2006 at 7:44 am

She’s so pretty. *hand*

Beth March 1, 2006 at 8:15 am

And the Kegels will help me….
handle the dildo cam better?

Ah, Ignorant Irene. I have Dumbass Debbie next door.

I think one of the hardest parts about all this is that you have to educate every second – you can never just explain how you feel.

Ornery March 1, 2006 at 8:31 am

I have a friend who also says some ignorant things, though not as stupid as the ones said by Irene. But the worst part is that my friend is a DOCTOR. Just goes to show that the medical profession is not all it’s cracked up to be.

P. March 1, 2006 at 8:42 am

It is so frustrating to me that there are people like this out there. It is exhausting trying to educate the fertile public on the intricacies of ART. There are so many preconceived notions about it!

Robber Barren March 1, 2006 at 9:08 am

Ah, our well-meaning friends. Maybe we can lock them all up on a boat together and send it out to sea for a long, long time…

geeky March 1, 2006 at 10:06 am

crap, i think i’m an “ignorant irene”. i mean, i wouldn’t have said the stuff about having too many kids, but i might have told you to have a glass of wine when you can’t drink :\

robyn March 1, 2006 at 11:48 am

She left out to relax and not think about it.

md March 1, 2006 at 2:01 pm

yeah, I hate the references to puppy litters too. C’MON!

Stephanie March 1, 2006 at 2:35 pm

ugh, it is all so tiring. i feel like i need to make a handout for people and that way i won’t have to have the tiring conversations over and over and over.

Manuela March 1, 2006 at 4:02 pm

Ditto Stephanie’s remark… I mgiht just actually do that.

Linda March 1, 2006 at 9:44 pm

Thank god she didn’t tell you to JUST RELAX, too. I’d have to slap her for that.

thalia March 2, 2006 at 1:38 am

I’d have got a lot stroppier during that exchange than you seem to have done. You poor thing!

skits March 2, 2006 at 3:48 am

Ah, the irony of having to deal with people like that and NOT being able to drink. Just reading that exchange made me want a shot of something.

Solonor March 2, 2006 at 4:41 am

I’m tellin’ ya… you’re gonna wind up with 5 or 6 and be on Jerry Springer or something. Sure, they SAY they’re only gonna stick in 2, but what if they lose count? What if THEY are the ones drinking all the alchohol you can’t have? But that’s what you get when you’re too cheap to go to a real clinic and settle for “Doctor Nick’s Fertility Specialist and Surf Center”.

I would be streesed. It’s probably just me, though. Relax. Don’t think about it.

Natalie March 2, 2006 at 5:40 am

Oh yeah, protocol! That’s that new calcium pill, right?!

Insensitive morons.

Rob March 2, 2006 at 7:37 pm

Kind of sounds like the female analog to the male “pissing contest.” Where women don’t actually listen to what the other woman is saying, nor know anything about the subject but feel compelled to give advice about it anyway.

akeeyu March 2, 2006 at 11:03 pm

I actually DID make a convenient handout for people.

Didn’t work. See, people who are dumb enough to say this crap? They also have very low reading comprehension skills.

PaintingChef March 5, 2006 at 2:07 pm

Mine is a “Misinformed Monica” and I just threw her a baby shower. She just L-O-V-E-S to tell me how I need to just “relax” and surely it’ll happen and why aren’t I pregnant yet anyway? ARGH! KILL KILL KILL!!!

Beth March 13, 2006 at 10:57 am

My favorite is “just relax, maybe take a vacation and you will get pregnant.” (I smacked my own mother for saying that to me.)

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