Luck be a lady

by statia on January 9, 2006

It’s crazy to think that a year ago, I was in the process of freaking out over wedding details. Freaking out over flying for 6 hours very high over A MASSIVE BODY OF WATER. Freaking out about getting shit done on time, and well, just plain freaking out. Because that’s what I do when I’m stressed. I freak out and worry about everything going wrong, so that when it goes right, I can pretend that I was totally and completely cool all along. I totally play off the coolness too. “Oh, everything working out just perfectly? Yeah, I knew that was going to happen.” Thank god my deodorant doesn’t give me away. “Never let them see you sweat.”

Of course not. I find that the screaming and loud shrieking gets the job done.

We’re approaching our first anniversary already and I can’t believe it. They say that the first year of marriage is the hardest. I think someone failed to tell us that we were getting the bent over the back of the chair version of hard. Complete with a fisting from Andre the Giant. But we’ve pulled through and manged to make it all work for us.

The second year brings on a new set of challenges. Like finally trying to get out of here, but not before figuring out a way to make IVF work. I no sooner sent my paperwork into Dr. Miracleworker, and they called me with a cancellation already. My original appointment was a month from tomorrow, but was now moved up to this Friday. Which I’m both thrilled and scared about. I’m not so much scared of the process. It’s taken me a long time to come to terms with the fact that we won’t be having childen the natural way. In fact, I’m not sure that I’ve fully come to terms with it 100%, but while conceiving naturally is totally amazing, there’s definitely something to be said for conceiving through scientific methods. When you get right down to it, the science of IVF is almost more amazing than conceiving naturally. ICSI and blastocycsts fascinate me. The fact that we live in a time that gives us this chance is just as much of a miracle. Your children being put back in side of you already as embryos. When it works out for the best, it’s just stunning, but when it doesn’t, it’s like another miscarriage all over again.

I definitely feel more relaxed about it than I have in the past. I don’t feel hopeless with this doctor. I have a more positive outlook.

But you wouldn’t know that would you? My deodorant works like a charm.

{ 11 comments }

Lisa January 9, 2006 at 7:36 pm

Happy almost anniversary and good luck with the IVF appt.

jen January 9, 2006 at 7:47 pm

Friday!! That is awesome!

:O)

Man, I really really do hope it all goes as you want it to..
And I am glad that you are more relaxed about it….

And..and…weee!! Good luck!!

jen January 9, 2006 at 7:47 pm

bah and Happy almost Anniversary!

Camille January 9, 2006 at 9:11 pm

Happy Anniversary and wishing you the best with IVF.

Deltus January 9, 2006 at 10:06 pm

If you need someone to come up and sniff your pits for a 3rd-party confirmation of nonskinkiness… well, unless it’s the hubby, you’re probably SOL. What do you think I am, a pervert pit-sniffer?

Good luck with the appt. Break a leg, or… whatever… what does one wish another to break for this sort of thing, anyway?

Jeanne January 10, 2006 at 5:04 am

Happy Anniversary! Good luck with your appointment on Friday

Erin January 10, 2006 at 5:07 am

Happy, happy anniversary! My best friend went through IVF, ending up going through three cycles of ICSI two years ago now and has beautiful twin girls as a direct result. It is fascinating stuff and really miraculous when you think about it.

Sending you best of luck wishes all the way from Boston.

donna January 10, 2006 at 10:26 am

Happy Anniversary!

I know how you feel about not getting to do it “the natural way.” I cried the whole time I got my first IUI, not because it hurt, but because I just didn’t want to be doing it that way. But I’m pretty much over it now, and just want one any way I can get one.

I’ll send fertile thoughts your way!

Donna January 10, 2006 at 11:52 am

We watched our best friends go through 4 IVF cycles before they were finally successful. I quickly lost my fascination with the process after watching her suffer for 3 years with all the drugs and procedures and failures. Not to put a damper on your enthusiasm, just telling you my side of the story. Now go forth and have a great appt.

Jen January 10, 2006 at 3:33 pm

Happy Anniversary! I think the earlier appt is an excellent sign. Hope it goes well!

robyn January 10, 2006 at 8:56 pm

Friday? Wahoooeeee — you’d better keep me posted! Crossing my legs for you!

Happy almost-anniversary!!! Can’t believe it’s been a year since we were talking about this on our cell phone somewhere in the middle of north Florida!

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