When I schedule a session of retail therapy, I don’t mess around

by statia on December 28, 2005

It’s been so nice being on vacation this week. It makes me want to win the lottery so that I can be a sloth for the rest of my life. I wouldn’t mind if my ass became a permanent part of this couch.

We headed to the mall on Monday which was the STUPIDEST idea ever. Seriously, I’ve been to the mall the day after Christmas, but this was fucking insane. After driving around for over a half an hour, the meester got extremely agitated. When the meester gets agitated he likes to step on the gas and come within two inches of plowing into the car in front of us and that makes me want to strangle him (not to mention the anxiety levels go up and my pants get filled with poo). Then we start to bicker like an old married couple and play the “I hate when you do….[insert idiosyncrasy here] when you drive” game.

I need to get a passenger’s side drivers license so that we can just avoid all of this nonsense.

So we headed back to the mall today because I have one pair of jeans that fit me the way that I love. Dear Janeville, I’ve said it many times, but it bears repeating, I love you so very much. Thank you for making jeans that are flattering to the 30 something crowd. Thank you for making jeans that don’t suffocate my crotch or make it feel like it’s splitting in half. Thank you for making jeans that don’t ride so low you can see my landing strip. The one thing that sucks about this store, is that it’s still in its infancy, therefore not all over the U.S. yet. I’m lucky to have two in my general area, but here’s a note to King of Prussia mall: If you don’t open a Janeville store by the time I move back, I’m burning the mall down.

Oh who am I kidding, I’m way too in love with King of Prussia mall to burn it down.

Plus, we got a new TV stand and DVD holder from Crate and Barrel. I feel like I’m finally starting to accumulate “big girl” furniture.

Christ almighty, what’s happening to me? What’s next? Pearls? I can’t take much more of this “grown up” shit.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: