Bad Poo Karma

by statia on November 19, 2004

Mikey raised the question earlier, who talks about shit more, me or him? He’s referred to us as the “shit twins”. Yeah, I know. I’m like, seven when it comes to potty humor. I can’t help it. I don’t try to help it. I love my poo-talkin’ self.

Which leads me to my next story. Morning liquids had caught up with me, so I go into the bathroom, and there’s someone in the first stall. I take the penthouse, and wait, pee, wait again. The other woman, is just sitting there, obviously waiting. She was playing the “I can wait for you to leave” game. You know the game I’m talking about. I never back down to the bathroom hold out challenge. Ever. Bitch, I invented that game. You’re talking to the girl that had the worst case of stage fright ever back in the day. About 5 minutes goes by, at this point, I’ve become absorbed in checking for ingrown hairs. I finally hear the roll of toilet paper start moving, she finishes up and goes on her merry way. At this point, I prepare to do my business, and in reward for my “win”, I get bad poo karma, in the way of “the breakoff” aka, the crayon sleeve.


If anything, the good thing is, that California has been extremely good for my regularity, in that I’m now a multiple times a day pooer. I’ll just go home, fire up the Sims, and wait until the big payoff, where I can feel like I lost five pounds.

{ 7 comments }

The Meeeeester November 19, 2004 at 3:56 pm

It is because you take your multi-pooper pills.

mikey November 19, 2004 at 4:01 pm

bwahahahah! i’ve never heard of shitting referred to as “the big payoff”.

geeky November 19, 2004 at 4:32 pm

i wonder what it says about me that i read a lot of blogs by people that talk about poop a lot.

Deltus November 19, 2004 at 8:09 pm

You know, I always thought that the lineups at the women’s washroom couldn’t be explained only by the fact that urinals for men are so quick to use. Now I know.

But don’t you just love those 5-pound poops?

Sibeal November 19, 2004 at 8:12 pm

I had a payoff poop yesterday. I thought of you. :)

Helen November 20, 2004 at 12:32 am

I am so glad it’s not just me. The irony kills me-I too, after a massive coffee enema, enjoy a game of the Sims thinking: I’m so five pounds lighter. I just know it.

Coffee . Addictive and a little gift to make us thinner.

LT November 20, 2004 at 2:45 pm

POOOOOOOOOP

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