Let’s live on prison island

by statia on September 27, 2004

So we went to Alcatraz on Saturday. Wheee, it was fun. I wish that half of the buildings weren’t in ruins. I love going into old abandoned buildings, but they’re all like, “blah blah, your saftey is important so KEEP OUT!” The island itself is a decent size. I thought it was just the main prison building, but there were at one point several buildings on the land, including an apartment building and a housing barracks. That’s right, people actually lived there. Kids grew up there. Apparently 90% of the correctional officers lived there. Who knew? A lot of it now is just old overgrown, stale urine smelling ruins, but you were pretty much free to roam about anywhere there weren’t gates or ropes up. And trust me when I tell you, everything is uphill. Both ways. In the snow. Good thing I had shoes.

They had audio tours of the main prison building, which was pretty cool, except that we all looked like certified assholes running in circles with headphones, while the tour narrator told us to go to various places. It wasn’t a round about tour either. It kind of went something like this. Kinda like sticking blindfolded people in a round room and telling them to find the corner. And the prison cells. They were like the size of a tuna can. Seriously, could you imagine having to take a shit on display? Or being the guy next to someone who happened to react badly to the mess hall dinner the night before? I thought the cells in eastern state were dank and small.

Good thing I realize that horizontal stripes aren’t becoming on me.


robyn September 27, 2004 at 8:37 pm

Did you at least get to call the guide Vicki?

Helen September 28, 2004 at 2:17 am

Kids grew up there.

Oh yeah….that’s got “intensive therapy” written all over that…

martha September 28, 2004 at 4:42 am

I saw the measurements of the cell and realized that some bedrooms in apartments here in NYC aren’t much bigger than that… of course, they don’t have a toilet in them as well.

julie September 28, 2004 at 5:19 am

were you planning on going without shoes???

jason September 28, 2004 at 6:03 am

I used to work with a guy that met Whitey Bulger while on a tour of the Rock — it was the first lead in like 10 years as to the whereabouts of Whitey…

SueBec September 28, 2004 at 6:42 am

TOTALLY having the flashbacks to So I married an axe murderer, too! “This way to the cafeteria!”

mikey September 28, 2004 at 3:11 pm

ok, you’ve seen alcatraz… but have you seen the Bush Man around the Wharf?

dude, he’s hilarious!

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