Ooooh pretty twinkle lights

by statia on February 28, 2004

One good thing about living close to the King of Prussia mall, is that well, it’s right there, and there’s just about every store you can imagine there. What better for a girl that loves shopping than to have one of the biggest malls in the US, ten minutes away? When I first moved here, I od’d on that mall. To the point that I have the mall gps™ built right into my brain. Lost? I’ll find you. Tiffany? I can get you there.

The big drawback to living near the mall, is the weekend tourists. People come from far away to spend a weekend at the mall. They bust out the maps, and stare dumbfounded, and walk 6 people wide. really really…………s-l-o-w. For the people that live around here, me specifically, this drives me absolutely insane. I rarely go to the mall anymore for a leisurely shopping day. I go in, park where I need to, run in, and run out. What I need is for people to pull over, look at the map, and then figure out where you’re going to go. Don’t do it while you’re walking through the mall, where I can’t get around you.

So you think it’d be wrong to carry around an airhorn?


unmute February 28, 2004 at 12:39 pm

perfect analogy: people don’t stop in the middle lane of i-95 north when they can’t figure out which exit to take, do they? so what’s the difference between car traffic and people traffic, other than a ton of steel here and there?

ed February 28, 2004 at 3:12 pm

Hallway sloths.

Is it so hard to observe the unwritten laws of pedestrian traffic? Walk on the right side of the mall when possible. dont walk more than two people wide. Simply be aware that people may be behind you.

Really, I dont think we’re asking too much. Pure, common courtesy. Will it come to pass in our day? I think not. Online shopping is becoming more and more attractive.

I just had to get that out. I feel better now.

valley February 28, 2004 at 3:15 pm

I’m with you 100%! Knock them on their ass!

Nick February 28, 2004 at 3:43 pm

In addition to the airhorn, take a slingshot. Just ping them in the ass. That’ll get them out of the way.

PJay February 28, 2004 at 4:22 pm

Absolutely not.

And when you’re done at the mall, keep the airhorn by the telephone. For those pesky telemarketers.

Works like a charm I tell ya…

Kevin February 28, 2004 at 5:02 pm

I’ll tell you who you never want to get in front of…old people. WTF makes them so slow on the freeway and so damn fast in the mall?!

MSG February 29, 2004 at 7:34 am

I worked at the KOP Coffee Beanery in the mall for five years as a teenager (it’s now an As Seen On TV store), and I always likened the mall pedestrians to the slow-moving, dull-eyed zombies in “Dawn of the Dead”.

Zuly March 2, 2004 at 6:46 pm

I was thinking of making a pilgrimage out there some Saturday… when I finally have money, that is. I hear it’s like shopping mecca.

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